I DON'T WANT A FUNERAL!..
UPDATE..IV'E CHANGE MY MIND..I WANT TO BE CRYNOGENICLY FROZEN...
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I KNOW ITS A MORBID SUBJECT...BUT ONE MIGHT AS WELL SAY WHAT ONE WANTS WHILE ONE STILL CAN..
AS YOU ALL KNOW I HATE RELIGION...ITS SELF-RIGHTEOUS AND DOWN RIGHT BORING..
MY P & M HAD ME CHRISTEND (i had no choice)..BUT I'VE NEVER BEEN MARRIED IN CHURCH, NOR DID I HAVE CHANTAL CHRISTENED..
THE ONLY TIME I'VE HAD A SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE IN CHURCH WAS AT MY COUSINS WEDDING BACK IN THE DAY..I WAS ON A SERIOUS COME DOWN FROM SOME GRADE 'A' ACID..MY PUPILS WERE LIKE SAUCERS..THE FLOWER IN MY BUTTON HOLE WAS GIVING ME INTIMIDATING LOOKS..
I SAID " GOD I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE"..I LOOKS UP AND HE/GOD WAS SITTING ON A PEW MAKING SILLY FACES AT THE VICAR WHILST ROLLING A JOINT...
HE SAID.."OH YOU CAN SEE ME ..MUST HAVE BEEN BLOODY GOOD ACID!"..
"NICE SANDALS" I SAID...
HE GOES "OH THANKS THEY'RE MY SONS"..(think about it)...
ANYHOO WHAT I WANT IS...WHEN I DIE..I WANT TO BE CREMATED..NO FUNERAL..
(imagine the embarrassment if only two people show up and one of them is the priest and the other is the grave digger??)..
WHY SHOULD I BE FORCED TO GO TO A CHURCH IN DEATH, WHEN I NEVER WENT IN LIFE??..
I JUST WANT TO DISAPPEAR...I WANT ONE PERSON TO TAKE MY ASHES..AND ON THE MOST BRIGHTEST WINDY DAY OR STORMY NIGHT ..LET THEM LOOSE INTO THE WIND...MY SPIRIT WILL FLY HIGHER WITHOUT THE BINDS OF THE RELIGIOUS MAFIA..AND I CERTAINLY DON'T WANT NO EULOGY FROM A PRIEST THAT NEVER MET ME..
OF COURSE IF THERE'S A NUCLEAR WAR (yeah right)...WE WILL ALL BE EVAPORATED ..PROBLEM SOLVED..
OH DON'T WORRY I'M NOT PLANNING ON GOING JUST YET..THERE'S STILL SOME MISCHIEF TO BE HAD...OH YESSS!!...
________________________________________________________
I KNOW ITS A MORBID SUBJECT...BUT ONE MIGHT AS WELL SAY WHAT ONE WANTS WHILE ONE STILL CAN..
AS YOU ALL KNOW I HATE RELIGION...ITS SELF-RIGHTEOUS AND DOWN RIGHT BORING..
MY P & M HAD ME CHRISTEND (i had no choice)..BUT I'VE NEVER BEEN MARRIED IN CHURCH, NOR DID I HAVE CHANTAL CHRISTENED..
THE ONLY TIME I'VE HAD A SPIRITUAL EXPERIENCE IN CHURCH WAS AT MY COUSINS WEDDING BACK IN THE DAY..I WAS ON A SERIOUS COME DOWN FROM SOME GRADE 'A' ACID..MY PUPILS WERE LIKE SAUCERS..THE FLOWER IN MY BUTTON HOLE WAS GIVING ME INTIMIDATING LOOKS..
I SAID " GOD I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE"..I LOOKS UP AND HE/GOD WAS SITTING ON A PEW MAKING SILLY FACES AT THE VICAR WHILST ROLLING A JOINT...
HE SAID.."OH YOU CAN SEE ME ..MUST HAVE BEEN BLOODY GOOD ACID!"..
"NICE SANDALS" I SAID...
HE GOES "OH THANKS THEY'RE MY SONS"..(think about it)...
ANYHOO WHAT I WANT IS...WHEN I DIE..I WANT TO BE CREMATED..NO FUNERAL..
(imagine the embarrassment if only two people show up and one of them is the priest and the other is the grave digger??)..
WHY SHOULD I BE FORCED TO GO TO A CHURCH IN DEATH, WHEN I NEVER WENT IN LIFE??..
I JUST WANT TO DISAPPEAR...I WANT ONE PERSON TO TAKE MY ASHES..AND ON THE MOST BRIGHTEST WINDY DAY OR STORMY NIGHT ..LET THEM LOOSE INTO THE WIND...MY SPIRIT WILL FLY HIGHER WITHOUT THE BINDS OF THE RELIGIOUS MAFIA..AND I CERTAINLY DON'T WANT NO EULOGY FROM A PRIEST THAT NEVER MET ME..
OF COURSE IF THERE'S A NUCLEAR WAR (yeah right)...WE WILL ALL BE EVAPORATED ..PROBLEM SOLVED..
OH DON'T WORRY I'M NOT PLANNING ON GOING JUST YET..THERE'S STILL SOME MISCHIEF TO BE HAD...OH YESSS!!...
posted by gypsy noir at 4/15/2007
84 Comments:
It's good to be thinking ahead, but you might want to consider writing down these last wishes and having them signed with a witness present. Then take the now "formalized" document to a parent, spouse, next of kin and make sure they know exactly what you want. Blogs are great, but they may not hold up in a court of law.
Why don't I ever get invited to weddings like that?
Seriously, doing your own thing sounds good to me Gypsy - and anything's poss these days, even if your anything is nothing. I say let Chantal know what you want and make it happen - but not yet please.
We didn't have Mum's funeral in a church, and it didn't really feel like a funeral, either. We had a gathering of friends at the funeral place (I refuse to say "home"), but ditched the celebrant guy they offered and did it ourselves. My brother and I spoke, and a childhood friend of Mum's with whom she'd grown up, and then the five grand-daughters got up together and read out a poem they'd written for her.
We chose a couple of Mum's favourite pieces to play to start and finish, and somewhere in the middle Madeleine, who was the oldest grandchild at eleven, played violin - Vivaldi's "Winter" largo - then we all went off and got pleasantly sloshed over a good meal. No service, no burial. Just a cremation with no-one around - she certainly wasn't; she was with us.
It was a great day. It shouldn't have happened for another twenty years or so, but at least it was how she wanted it.
That's an interesting idea! Using your blog as your last will and testament...lol...will the influence of the blog never end!
I agree with the wish to be cremated, wee one - if only cos burial's a waste of space! Not being relligious either, I wouldn't want a church funeral - just a really good wake! Mind you, I'd want to be there too!
Just read Margie's comment here, and her mum's funeral sounds rather similar to my dad's, except we did have a church service for him as he was very devout himself and the vicar had known him for years so it was very personal, but we also made it a family affair with our own readings and the music he loved. It can indeed be a very special occasion whether you go the church route or not!
LOL, your sister's wedding had an unexpected visitor, hey? Love the sandals thing...something old...something borrowed ;-)
This comment has been removed by the author.
By the way, Sam, you were quick off the mark!!
Val, I agree with you - I want a proper celebratory wake, but if it's going to be a half-decent party I don't want to miss it!
interesting topic, let me thinks on it a bit and i'll be back. i like your plans.
hope all is swell!
chrylann
Here here!! I dont see why we should be institutionalised in death when we never were in life!
I would like to be buried in my own back garden where I could watch over my family or maybe just flung in the sea - I love the ocean :-P
I don't think it is morbid at all Gypsy. I think planning ahead and making your wishes well and truly known is an excellent idea. I come from a fairly religious family background, which actually made me feel that religious people are dangerous and untrustworthy. Completely wrong to generalize, I know... there are far more good religious people than bad... at least I tell myself this. there are many reasons for this feeling, that I will not get into now. Sufficeth to say, my childhood was not precisely happy and ideal.
So, as far as a funeral, yes please no churches for me!
It would be ridiculous, though I must admit, I do still on occasion like to visit a Catholic church (my mom was Catholic, my dad Pentecostle (don't even know how to spell it correctly) and they were the ones that made me despise the whole church thing). the really old Catholic churchs hold a certain draw for me, whether spiritual or mystical or artistic I am not sure. And I love cemetaries. So peaceful. Again, a whole different story. Or better yet, a post.
When I die, I also want to be cremated. And my ashes scattered. If my kids want a bit to keep, that's okay. I have some of my daughter's ashes, but the rest, yep, spread 'em. I think over the mountains, as I have spent essentially all my life in them. Or is he is willing, over Johnny Depp.
But I definitely want a gathering... but nothing mournful, I want a party. Not a drunken bash, that would not be in character for me. But something in the summer, an informal gathering of friends and family, potluck, lots of food and drink, kids playing in the yard, people laughing and talking and celebrating being alive and happy. Tip a glass of wine for me and mourn me not because I am fine, fine fine! And music, lots of music.
I want it to celebrate happiness... joy. I've had a good life, and whether I have one year left or 100, I plan to live them, as best I can, so that is how I would want to be remembered.
oh, and to clarify, I am, if anything, Wiccan.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts..
iv'e changed my mind..i want to be cryonegenicly frozen..but i'll have to make haste, need to apply lots of eyeliner first..
about sam..bloody hell! talk about vultures soaring!..
or how about floating about in some preserving agent to be reanimated later like Mr. Freeze's wife in the Batman movie? That looked ever so glam, her hair and flowing dress sort of moving in the current of whatever the clear liquid she was in was. But you would need really waterproof mascara for sure.
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