Ill never forget the first time i clapped eyes on neil....it was the early 90'S i was turning tricks....ooops i mean eating fish and chips outside the broken arms in scunthorp...i turned my head and there he was....upside down being hung by his ankles out the window of the upstairs concert room....i remember to this day what he was wearing....an out of date electric blue leather jacket...black drainpipe jeans and beetle crusher shoes....he had upset one of the band members of the group they were supporting....depreche-commode i think they were called....anyway even as he hung there upside down the street lamp playing off his startled eyes....i fancied him...he seemed familiar ..maybe becouse their posters were pastered in every take-away in town...as i leaned forward to kiss him he was hoisted up back through the window...so i went in to the pub and promtly made my way to the concert room...where they were all hugging and forgiving each other like....they did a fabulous set...and afterwards he came over and we had a drink together...he asked what i was doing in scunthorp and i told him a kind man from newcastle called billy the cap paid for me to go up there and work the streets ...sort of public service type thing you know relieving men of their stress....it wasnt till he pointed out to me that billy the cap was infact a pimp and i was one of his shall we say *girls*....then out of the blue he said...you dont have to live this way ...come with me be my groupie ill show you a better life...we're embarking on a non stop tour of birmingham this tuesday...i looked up and smiled as he uttered those magic words....GET IN THE BACK OF THE VAN!......to be continued....