MR DEAD BOTTLED!..

OK Margie kicked my bottom to do another post!! (ouch!)

Following on from Stevie's post post about e-bay reminded me of something strange I uncovered boxing day three years ago (yes alright I spent boxing day looking for strange things on E-bay).. WHAT?

Chantelle will remember this one..So here it is..are you sitting comfy?..
Story of The Ghost in a Bottle..

MR DEAD BOTTTLED

I HAVE JUST RETURNED FROM MY HOLIDAY IN MALTA, WITH LITTLE MORE THAN I COULD EVER HAVE IMAGINED.

I WAS SITTING ON THE BALCONY ON THE LAST DAY , ENJOYING A GLASS OF MADLIEN LIQUEUR, A LOVELY MALTESE DRINK, FROM THE BOTTLE THAT I HAD PURCHASED THAT DAY, WHEN A MAN WALKED THROUGH THE WALL, SAT DOWN ON THE CHAIR OPPOSITE ME, AND SAID HELLO.

I SAID HELLO AND ASKED WHY HE HAD SAT DOWN. (A LITTLE BIT STARTLED, AS YOU CAN IMAGINE!)

HE SAID THAT HE WAS A SPIRIT, WHO, WHEN HE WAS ALIVE, HAD NEVER MET HIS SOUL MATE, AND NOW HE ROAMS THE EARTH IN SEARCH OF ONE WHO WILL LOVE HIM, AND FEELS THAT THEY ARE MEANT TO BE.

"I HAVE WALKED FOR SO LONG," HE EXPLAINED, TELLING ME THAT EVERY TIME HE THOUGHT HE MET THE 'ONE', THEY JUST LOOKED RIGHT THROUGH HIM, AND WALKED ON BY...HE WAS WEARY AND LOW.

I TOLD HIM WE SHOULD DRINK THE REST OF THE BOTTLE, AND BY THE TIME WE HAD FINISHED IT, I WOULD HAVE THE ANSWER FOR HIM. I REACHED FOR ANOTHER GLASS, AND AS I POURED, HE TOLD ME TALES OF HIS LIFE, AND OF HIS TRAVELS....

AS OUR GLASSES LANDED ON THE TABLE , EMPTY LIKE THE BOTTLE I TOLD HIM THAT HE SHOULD JUMP IN THE BOTTLE AND TRAVEL BACK WITH ME, AND I WOULD FIND HIM A HOME TO LIVE IN. SOMEWHERE HE COULD LIVE AS SPIRIT AND FIND A WOMAN, ONE WHO WILL LOVE HIM.

HE AGREED.

HE NEVER GAVE ME HIS NAME, AND I NEVER ASKED, BUT I CALLED HIM MR. DEAD, AND HE SEEMS TO LIKE IT. HE SAYS IT REMINDS HIM THAT HE NEVER HAS TO WORK, OR EXERCISE EVER AGAIN, AND HE CAN WATCH AS MUCH TV AS HE LIKES, AND SINCE HE DOESN'T EAT, HE MAKES THE PERFECT PARTNER.

And there you have it, a touching tale indeed, needless to say I was tempted to buy it..Then I thought Naaaaah!..